{ musings }

Dance Dance Dance!

This makes me unbelievably happy!

Where the Hell is Matt? (2008) from Matthew Harding on Vimeo.

Amazing Life

Even when it sucks, life is still pretty damned amazing!!

(I wish there was a real video for this song...it is so pretty, I wanted you to HEAR it!)

Come with me

I want to show you something

You don’t see

You’ve given up trying

Watch the leaves

Rustling in the wind

The summer breeze

That’s living and dying

Ah, Ah

Come with me

Remember when you were

So carefree

Laughing not crying

Spin around

And listen carefully

Can you hear the sound

Of living and dying

It’s amazing, it’s amazing, this amazing life

It’s amazing, it’s amazing, this amazing life

Come with me

Stop making it so hard

You can be

Laughing not crying

Nothing’s changed

Just got to recognize

That it’s a game

Of living and dying

Ah, Ah

It’s amazing, it’s amazing, this amazing life

It’s amazing, it’s amazing, this amazing life

It’s amazing, it’s amazing, this amazing life

It’s amazing, it’s amazing, this amazing life

Come on now baby please Just look around

Look around it’s there

It’s good to feel alive

Feel alive, feel alive

This amazing life It’s good to feel alive

Feel alive, feel alive

This amazing life

This amazing life

Relax it’s easy, relax it’s easy

This amazing life

Come on now baby please

This amazing life

Come on, come on, come on with me

Relax it’s easy, relax it’s easy

Look around, look around

Syrup and Honey: Today's Playlist

This morning, messing around with the Genius function in iTunes, I whipped up this play list of groovy, sexy, slightly jazzy and always easy songs that make me smile.  Enjoy!

• The Heart of Life    John Mayer
• All We Are    Matt Nathanson   
• Like A Woman    Tony Rich Project   
• Nothing Ever Hurt Like You    James Morrison   
• Hope    Jack Johnson
• Best Days    Graham Colton   
• Butterfly    Jason Mraz       
• Syrup & Honey    Duffy       
• Suspended    Matt Nathanson       
• Feeling Good    Michael Bublé   
• All At Once    The Fray   
• Kelsey    Metro Station       
• Coyotes    Jason Mraz       
• Angel    Jack Johnson   
• Breathe Me    Sia   
• Clarity    John Mayer       
• You Make It Real    James Morrison   
• Cold Shoulder    Adele       
• Only Human    Jason Mraz       
• Crack the Shutters    Snow Patrol   
• Sleeping In    Postal Service       
• Right As Rain    Adele       
• Those Sweet Words    Norah Jones   
• So Still    Mozez       
• Popsicle Toes    Michael Franks       
• Lover Undercover    Melody Gardot   
• While We're In Love    Ivy       
• All Night Long    Diana Krall   
• Giving Everything Away for Free    Daniel Merriweather       
• What You Do (Feat. Ne-Yo)    Chrisette Michele       
• You & Me    Dave Matthews Band       

SWOON!

This is seriously the hottest song I've ever heard. Oh my!

Wide Awake and So Alive!

Long time no post.
So busy...re-entry back into reality is always challenging.

Beached it for a month in California with my family and my precious girls.  It was perfect and cleansing and renewing and resetting.  I connected with old friends and made many new friends.  I read about nine books and added another nine to the ever-growing pile to be read on my nightstand.  I am more clear now that I have been in many, many years.

I generally avoid getting too personal here on this blog, but most of you are my dear friends and you have easily pieced together the story of the sharp and unexpected turn my life took just before the dawn of this new year.  I had hoped for a year of dramatic change and growth, but had no idea what a bargain I had struck!  ha! "When you pray for rain, be prepared to deal with some mud!"  I also know that sometimes when I post these raw, personal musings, it resonates with many of you.  I am grateful for the opportunity, then, to share my story a little more freely with you in the hope that it will, in fact, inspire someone else. 

Now at nearly the 8 month mark of my new life, I feel as though I have been moving at light speed through this process.  For many years, something had/has been preparing me on spiritual level for this and once I gave into that, stepping off the cliff of fear and into the safety net of faith, my journey has been amazing!  Never in my life have I felt so wide awake and alive.  Never in my life have I felt more clear on MY path and my purpose.  Never in my life have I felt so solid and grounded in who I am.  Never in my life have I felt so at peace in my skin.  Never in my life have I felt so receptive to love in all its forms.  I am drawing people and experiences and insights into my life that are beyond wonderful.  I am amazed. I am blessed.  I am grateful.

Sometimes I shock myself with the level of sincere gratitude I have right now! Here I am, in the midst of one of the most potentially challenging life-changes a person can go through...the dissolution of a marriage, and yet I am not afraid or at all hesitant. I am sad that things didn't turn out the way I had hoped or planned, but yet at peace that they are unfolding as they were perfectly intended.  If I had not been blessed by the acts of the person I thought I was closest to in all the world...the acts which unexpectedly CHANGED my path, I am not sure how long I would have remained on that path, unfulfilled, unappreciated, unloved.  I made compromises....many, many compromises, and I own them all.  I ALLOWED the situation to become what it was, even though I may not have been aware of the exact details.  

It is right.  I am good.  I am actually pretty freaking' awesome! My vibrations are higher and clearer than they have been in many, many years...if ever...and for the first time in a long time I am FEELING life with increasing clarity. I am racing headlong into life...drawing it all up into me as a woman who hasn't drunk of this richness in many, many years.  I want to do it all, experience it all, taste it all, LIVE it all. I want to cry with abandon, love with fierce intensity, sing at the top of my lungs, laugh until I can't breathe, and dance until my feet hurt!

If you've been reading my blog for any length of time, you'll know that often song lyrics hit me square between the eyes and express my feelings much better than I ever could.  This song (and the artist) are among my favorites right now.  The words are ME right now.  When the lyrics say I am dyin' inside, I consider this part of the renaissance process...the old me must die before the Phoenix can rise from the ashes.

Turn it up REALLY LOUD and enjoy... I know I am finally beginning to ENJOY and know that I will be and AM alright!! 

xoxo  Kim

Matt Nathanson - Car Crash

I'm wide awake and so alive
Ringing like a bell
Tell me this is paradise
And not someplace I fell
'Cause I keep on fallin' down

I wanna feel the car crash
I wanna feel the capsize
I wanna feel the bomb drop, the earth stop
'Til I'm satisfied
I wanna feel the car crash
'Cause I'm dyin' on the inside
I wanna let go and know
That I'll be alright, alright

Just push me 'til I have to fly
I've shed my skin, my scars
Take me deep out past the lights
Where nothing dims these stars
Nothing dims these stars

I wanna feel the car crash
I wanna feel the capsize
I wanna feel the bomb drop, the earth stop
'Til I'm satisfied
I wanna feel the car crash
'Cause I'm dyin' on the inside
I wanna let go and know
That I'll be alright, alright

So right
It's all wrong

I'm wide awake and so alive

I wanna feel the car crash
I wanna feel the capsize
I wanna feel the bomb drop, the earth stop
'Til I'm satisfied
I wanna feel the car crash
'Cause I'm dyin' on the inside
I wanna let go and know
That I'll be alright, alright

Top Ten Reasons....

That today was a GREAT day to be home sick in bed with a fever, snuffy nose and wicked, bone-rattling cough:

10.  Staying in your cute, owl-ey Nick & Nora jammies all day.
9.  Having your Hubby and super-duper pals keep your kids from bugging you.
8.  Eating cookies in bed.
7.  Having the big dog come in and occasionaly lick my face to make sure I'm ok.
6.  NOT having to go out to lunch with my PIL!
5.  Having a sweet little girl (who GAVE you the damn virus) snuggle you and rub your feet off and on all day.
4.  Having a kick-ass lap-top to waste time on Facebook while in bed.
3.  A Project Runway marathon.
2.  Naps.  Lots of naps.
1.  And....this video.  Don't know why, but this song/video is making me so happy today!  (As happy as one can be with a fever and a nasty cold.)

A Happy For You...

Feelin' Groovy - - - >

I LOVE music.  Pretty much all kinds of music, except for not a big fan of C&W, sorry, folks.  I love 80's alternative, old school R&B, punk, funk, anything you can dance to and yes, I love nasty-ass reggeton too! 

While procrastinating this afternoon, I decided that I'd waste 2 hours of my time and put a VERY FEW of my many faves on PLAYLIST and have hooked 'em up over on the right side-bar (If you want to play, see and scroll through them all easily, click on the box in the lower right-hand corner that says "Launch Standalone Player"). I was NICE enough not to put them on auto-play (so you don't spit your coffee out all over your keyboard when Pitbull comes on screaming through your speakers)...so click on 'em and give a little listen!  Quite eclectic, a little funky, some good old 80's....but still, they didn't have a LOT of the music that moves me.  There are SO MANY more songs I really wanted to add....some by Yaz, "X" and a lot of funkier alternative and electronic stuff.  Maybe when I have a spare day (ha!) I'll upload a few of my MP3s and add them to the list.

Are any of my songs on YOUR list?  Are any on my list going to NOW be on your list?  Any that I should add to my list?  I wanna hear...

Summertime Anthem

I was tickled to receive some fun recognition from Kristy. Apparently she loves my PIL stories...so I'd better do her proud and get hoppin' on a new one, eh?!  Sorry Kristy...I'm on vacay from that nightmare for a little while longer...but thanks for the kind words!!

I am now supposed to TAG five more Rockin Girl Bloggers whose blogs entertain, amuse and inspire me, so I am skipping the usual suspects (who already know I adore them!) and going a little (but not too far) off my beaten path:  I tag Lainie (because she is pee your pants funny), Linda & Karen (because they are the Che Guevaritas of the art world), Teague (because she has a potty mouth just like me), Tonya (because she the stuff she creates between the hours of 2am and 5am are better than I could pull out of my ass ANY time of day) and Pam (because she rocks!).

Still loving summertime here in Oxnard.  Been spending LOTS of quality time with the kiddos, my parents, extended family, friends and my grandparents.  Lots of time in the pool, lots of sandcastles on the beach, lots of great meals together and lots of fierce games of cards and dominoes.

  Friday evening I went to the weekly "Ice Breakers" event with the 'rents at their club.  They keep trying to convince me it is a yacht club, but I am not convinced it is more than a drinking club.   Nonetheless, great drinks and appetizers and their friends (photos to left and right) are a fun bunch.  A little "right" but really fun...and the bartenders already know my drink after only three visits, so I'm sold. 

I cut out early last night to snap some beach-side photos of Amy-magic-hands and her squeeze Dan.  Gawd...love this girl!  She is SUCH a kindred spirit...we are on the same wavelength about SO MANY things...just LOVE her energy so I offered to take some pics of her and her boyfriend.  They are were absolutely adorable and SO APPRECIATIVE!  Beach shoots are TOUGH...especially with not a cloud in the sky AND a fierce on-shore wind mucking up not one but TWO UV filters before I just gave up (when I came home and cleaned them, the stuff that came off them was GREEN)!  I'll sneak you a peek at those photos after we return to AZ and get back onto my big badboy computer at home.  My teensy-tiny little laptop's monitor is not calibrated (so I hate the way the images I do on it look) AND it is so slow (old) that is SCREAMS at me every time I open up CS3.

  While I was busy Friday evening, the wee-chicks had a dinner party and sleepover at Nana's house.  Oh, my dear, sweet little Nana!!! (Click on photo to enlarge...this is one of her 89th birthday portraits I recently took.) Many of my friends have met and love her ALMOST as much as I do...she is pretty much an angel on earth.  Sweet BEYOND sweet...and just a treasure.  She was rather bad off last summer while we were here due to a few fractured vertebrae, so this summer she is hell-bent to make up for lost time, especially with the little ones. 

Since she lives about 100 steps from my 'rents house in a darling senior citizen's mobile home park (right on the beach!), the girls are over at her house at least an hour or two every day.  They have their own little groove over at Nana's house...they bake almost daily (pies, brownies, cookies, bread, etc...), they plant flowers in her garden, they color and paint, they do puzzles, they snuggle in her bed, they take long walks around the park with her in her walker...visiting with all her neighbors (who also adore her) and often bringing baked goods to elder shut-ins, they pick huge bouquets of roses off all the neighbor's bushes, and having delightful meals complete with china, fabric napkins (gasp!), silver and crystal, under Nana's beautiful Swarovsky chandelier (yes, every meal is an EVENT!).  The cutest recent thing is that last week, when Olivia spent the night without her sister there also, she forgot her nightie so Nana let her sleep in one of her silky, satin nightgowns.  Olivia was in PRINCESS HEAVEN!  Word apparently traveled fast and this weekend BOTH girls "forgot" their jammies...so both got to sleep in silky soft Nana gowns!  This especially warms my heart because this is exactly what I used to do at their age when I'd go spend weekends at her house.  :-)

Today we went to the 14th annual Salsa Festival in the old historic district of Oxnard...a ritual we ALL look forward to each year.  Lots of people, artisan booths, tons of FOOD, fabulous live salsa music on the main stage and lots of fun stuff to see and do.  We all did the salsa tasting tent this year...ate so many different versions and spins on salsa my head was spinning and my taste buds were FRIED!  Thank goodness for the carne asada street tacos and shave ice to help me recover!  The kids made art ON tortillas (yes, only in the barrio, folks!) - they came out really cute and are proudly on display UNTIL they start to mold over.  You can check out the photos from our day here.

This afternoon was kinda chilly and windy on the beach so I grabbed my smallest punk and made her take a little siesta with me then cut out for a quick pedicure so my piggies look cute for my dear friend Michele's baby shower tomorrow.

OK...so back to my post title:  Don't know why, but lovin' this song right now.  It just fits the vibe here in 'Nard and has that nice old school feel...and yes, I release my inner-Latina when I am here...wanna make something out of it?!?! 

Some Cheetah-licious Numbers

• 2 months of waiting
• $200 for 4 tickets to the concert
• ($160 profit made by selling one set of the tickets on eBay)
• $46.00 (of her own money) spent at Justice for a new (modest) cheetah print ensemble
• 1/2 hour of driving to the Dodge Theater in downtown Phoenix
• $5 for parking
• $20 for a Cheetah Girls Program
• 1darling blonde-wigged teenage songstress
• 3 animal-print clad teenage Disney Divas
• 5000 screaming pre-teen girls and their shell-shocked parents
• four fairly damaged eardrums

What does this all add up to?  One happy 8 1/2 year old daughter who is now convinced I am the coolest mom on the planet and one tiny  4 1/2 year old little sister who fell asleep clutching the neon green Cheetah Girl glow-stick her big sissy brought back for her as a souvenir.

Priceless.